ok, done for a while.

i really fucked up tonight; i was chip leader in the HORSE tourn with 9 left, 6 get paid, and guess who goes out 8th.

snatching defeat from the jaws of victory. i had a *sloppy* LHE round where i had the best hand obliterated every time, it was just obscene. i started the LHE round with about 16500 chips, 500/1000 IIRC.. and by the time stud came around, i was down to about 6000.

i picked up AsTsAc5h in the BB, got into a reraise war after deciding i was going to chip up or go home. flop was like, 8J9, 1 spade. i was almost positive i was up against something like A2KK or A2KQ or even A23A..

Ks on the turn gives me broadway straight draw and nut flush draw, so we get it all in.

just like last night, fucker flips 88xx (i was too horrified to notice the other cards). river Kh fills him up, and im out like whoa.

so obv i have to lose 120$ playing 3/6 2-7 triple draw. it was fucking merciless, i didnt even play badly. smooth 8? meet 76542. i faced the wheel on 2 occasions as well, and every time i started out with not one but occasionally *two* deuces in my hand. i kept on improving every draw, then id notice some bastard standing pat the last draw and everytime, he had the goods.

so no more of that. not for a while.

i go to prima, and i see a 2/4 plo game with a 231$ average pot. i have 140$ in my poker roll there, 300$ in my sportsbook that i 'protected' last time i got raped up. sit with my 140. get it in HU against a huge stack who flips KK37 vs my AA56.

flop: K53, etc etc.

oh and there was the 50$ HU nlhe sng on bodog then, where 44 did not beat JJ.

look im not going to add up the numbers for what i lost tonight, its not that type of party, not anymore.

i cashed out 500$ from stars, i have about 140$ left there. im going to take another stab at the horse tomorrow night then probably piss away the remainder, maybe i can sat into a tourn with the FPP's ive accrued lately.

as far as prima goes, you know, whatever. i deposited 200, withdrew the 200$ + 600$ more, plus i got 500$ out of a 200$ stars deposit thats only now been dropped down to 140$ after all... i cant complain. and if karo wins april 2nd, ill be back up to about 375$ on prima i think, which is more than enough to start grinding up again.

so yeah its all about bodog now. i do have enough to join the sunday 100$ MTT there, i will probably do that and see how things go.

if they go like i expect, im just going to be taking some time off from poker, at least for substantial money, until i (possibly) head to reno for my birthday (or LA actually...).

or, more likely, ill end up taking the sum cash ive cashed out (1200$ about), and using that plus some of my next paycheck for a down payment on a used Kia or Saturn.

and hey, if i money in the horse tourn tomorrow (really pretty realistic if i play solid and stop FUCKING UP LIKE A GODDAMNED CHIMP) then anything goes.

besides, im looking forward to not dicking around with poker for a spell. im not sleeping well and work has been a savage and hellish nightmare. so yeah its time to take my foot off the pedal and cool off probably.

i made some money, it was a successful run.

i think i can do better, maybe. or maby not. im starting to wonder seriously if my edge is really substantial enough to really make enough money to justify the effort.

i do feel like everytime i make one of these runs, i get a little further. eventually im going to end up on a more consistent profit arc that affords me the chance to move up into substantial cash games, for example.

if youre profiting 1BB an hour consistently in a 20/40 stud game, after all, thats 240$ for 6 hours of playing poker. thats real money. one big win in a tourn, and thats something to really consider.

i dont know, im really spacey right now. cheers.